December 2019

Let me share a little secret.

Getting old is lame, especially having to deal with my insanely-briskly growing eyebrows. What is the fuckin’ point of them growing so damn quickly, perplexing and shocking this is? Once a month I have to bring my wireless shears, hide behind the van like a ninja and use the car mirror in order to see what’s going on and trim them. They go flying all over the place, millions of them and they’re all the length of an elderly ferret.

I don’t wish this upon anyone.

Monday MORNING!!!!

We got super drunk for breakfast then went for a big bike ride and now….IT’S A PIZZA/CALZONE PARTY!!! WEEEE!!